By Rae Valoon
From sadness… to experiencing the Renewed… greeting the Miraculous in everyday life!
“Do not conform yourselves to the standards of this world, but let God transform you inwardly by a complete change of your mind. Then you will be able to know the will of God.” – Romans 12:2
Numerous spiritual mentors, philosophies and teachings have assisted me in my soul’s growth. They call for “Finding the Beauty” amongst the darkness; being “Open to the Possibility of Great Change;” and the consistent and sustained effort it takes to reach and continue to thrive in God’s Kingdom. There is also Forgiveness, the need to Move On, and… living in the moment fully.
Feeling lost, confused, uncertain… is not the comfort we humans seek. So we divert our attentions overworking, drinking too much, or spending too much… These ultimately lead to more stress; sending us further into our own self-created Abyss.
I was reminded the other day through a heart-filled conversation with a dear friend, of the simple—yet not so easy—first step to take when we are faced with a great deal of inner angst/turmoil. Stripping ourselves of established role(s) & the self-identity we have created by long-term behavior and words—is a beneficial beginning. Naked in our vulnerability—being seen as never before—is the first step towards the Miraculous. Right here, RIGHT NOW… choose our next thought, word, and/or actions differently. And I mean RADICALLY different!
In my own pursuits, I look back and there have been genuine efforts to drastically alter my approach. Other times, I metaphorically substituted the word, “crimson” (a deep purplish red) instead of simply saying “RED” instead. Truly, not much difference. What makes it harder… when we do “be” different… others have the tendency to continue to see/react/respond to us as they always have until they ‘get in the habit’ of relating to us with fresh eyes. This takes time, patience and diligence.
Our words give LIFE to what lies within us. Our behavior creates a Reputation; for better or for worse. The roles we have accepted, the ego’s identity we cling to, have been sculpted and nurtured by our very own words and behavior. The good news– roles and identity can be UN-DONE!
In my conversion with my ‘brother in spirit’, I mentioned a recurring dream I’ve been having for well over a year. I’ve had this dream of either moving into or moving out of an apartment standing amongst all my furniture and accumulated junk. Having this dream at least twice a week SOMETHING is trying to be communicated to me!!! Despite thinking about it, writing about it, talking about it… I kept having this dream.
If I were to have this dream one more time… I would go crazy.
I prayed before bed at night.
In my dream this particular night, I was comfortably living in what was once my aunt’s home. I was standing in the bright kitchen drinking a glass of water, looking out the window into the sunlight. A Voice told me I was making my life miserable by carrying with me images and memories of the past that were filled with disappointment and sadness. In reality, for as much sadness as I have experienced, I have experienced at least as much happiness. All these years, I’ve become accustomed to hauling around this same junk. Moving in here, moving out there, yet never really living in my home.
When I woke up from this dream I made a decision. From this point on… I needed to catch myself. What am I thinking? What images am I conveying to others via the words I speak? What memories/furniture do I choose to keep that will reside with me in my home?
For as much as we’d like Heaven to come to us simply by praying, then magically being at peace forever; CREATING RENEWED LIFE TAKES WORK. It takes steady and sustained effort. It takes consistent mindfulness and awareness of the role we are acting out—then making the choice with each step—what we will do, think or say.
I could be angry that I’ve been hauling all this useless sadness/furniture around in my life. AND/OR I could be brimming with joy for being given the gift of clarity and freewill to change things. It truly comes down to Choice. And the persistence to meet the Moment head on—walking an everlasting life of Renewal—Greeting the Miraculous in everyday life.
The Seed of Vulnerability
being at home
in my vulnerability
is where I discover the seed
of strength & wisdom
…from which who I AM
~rae veloon 2*19*15